OF

READY-MADE SPEECHES,

CONTAINING

EXAMPLES

ON THE FOLLOWING SUBJECTS:

LOYALTY, BISHOP AND CLERGY OF THE DIOCESE,
THE ARMY, NAVY, AND THE VOLUNTEERS,
POLITICAL, FORENSIC, AND ELECTIONEERING,

RAILWAYS, THE DRAMA, FRIENDLY SOCIETIES, LOCAL
DOMESTIC, WEDDINGS, CHRISTENINGS AND BIRTHDAYS,
CONVIVIAL, RACE AND REGATTA DINNERS,

OPENING OF INDUSTRIAL EXHIBITIONS AND WORKING MEN'S
CLUBS, THE EARLY CLOSING MOVEMENT,
&c. &c.

With Appropriate Quotations, Toasts and Sentiments, &c.

No glass renders a man's form or likeness so true as his speech.

BEN JONSON.

Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may,
know how ye ought to answer every man.

LONDON:

WILLIAM BOWDEN, PRINTER, 23, RED LION STREET, HOLBORN, W.C.

PREFACE.

THE following circumstance gave rise to the publication of this collection of "Ready-made Speeches." While pursuing my avocation of a provincial bookseller, a French gentleman entering my shop addressed me thus, "Sir, I want a little English speaker book." I placed in his hands a copy of "Enfield's Speaker," whereupon he said, "No! no! no! Sir, that is not what I want: Iwant the little book of English Speeches." I observed that Enfield's was one of the most popular "Speakers," but that I had Mavor's, Knowles's, Brewer's, and a variety of others of a similar character, to which he replied, “No! no! no! excuse me, I want the book of English Speeches already made to hand, because for example, I have to go because I am invited to the English wedding to morrow,—that is, the next day after that, to the wedding of my friend the English lady that spent a great portion of

her life in my native town, which is in Franceshe marry the English gentleman who is also my friend-all will be grand-I shall be called on to say something, to speak-when my health is what you call drunk-then I must say the speech, and I must say something about the newly married couple—to wish joy-happiness, and all that sort of thing-something what is pretty nice funny-make the young folks laugh -flatter my young friends that is married-and all that; you understand-comprendre, eh?" I confessed that I did not know of such a work in the English language; there were many “Letter Writers" to give persons an idea of wording a letter, "Pulpit Helps" in the shape of skeleton sermons for the instruction of young clergymen ; but as to "Ready-made Speeches,” except ponderous political ones, I did not think that such a work existed. He expressed his surprise, adding, that he had seen such books in his own and the German (Allemand) language. "It is surprise verymuch." He further added, that he had been into every bookseller's shop in the town but that no one seemed to understand what he did really want so well as I did. I acknowledged the compliment, and being then and there struck