scared out of him : if the devil have him not in feesimple, with fine and recovery,1o he will never, I think, in the way of waste, attempt us again. Mrs. Ford. Shall we tell our husbands how we have served him? Mrs. Page. Yes, by all means; if it be but to scrape the figures out of your husband's brains. If they can find in their hearts the poor unvirtuous | fat knight shall be any farther afflicted, we two will still be the ministers. Mrs. Ford. I'll warrant they'll have him publicly shamed and methinks there would be no period 20 to the jest, should he not be publicly shamed. Mrs. Page. Come, to the forge with it, then; shape it: I would not have things cool. [Exeunt, SCENE III.-A room in the Garter Inn. Enter Host and BARDOLPH. Bard. Sir, the Germans desire to have three of your horses: the duke himself will be to-morrow at court, and they are going to meet him. Host. What duke should that be, comes so secretly? I hear not of him in the court. Let me speak with the gentlemen; they speak English? Bard. Ay, sir; I'll call them to you. Host. They shall have my horses; but I'll make them pay; I'll sauce them: they have had my house a week at command: I have turned away my other guests: they must come off; 21 I'll sauce them, Come. [Exeunt. SCENE IV-A room in FORD's house. Enter PAGE, FORD, MISTRESS PAGE, MISTRESS FORD, and SIR HUGH EVANS. Evans. 'Tis one of the pest discretions of a 'oman as ever I did look upon. Page. And did he send you both these letters at an instant? Mrs. Page. Within a quarter of an hour. thou wilt; I rather will suspect the sun with cold, Than thee with wantonness: now doth thy honour stand, 19. In fee-simple, with fine and recovery. Legal forms of expression: the first signifying possession for ever; the second, in assurance most strong. 20. No period. No due conclusion. 21. Come off. An old phrase, equivalent to the modern vulgarism, Come down with the cash; that is, to pay. In him that was of late a heretic, Page. 'Tis well, 'tis well; no more: But let our plot go forward: let our wives Page. How to send him word they'll meet him in the Park at midnight? Fie,fie! he'll never come. Evans. You say, he has been thrown in the rivers; and has been grievously peaten, as an old 'oman: methinks there should be terrors in him that he should not come; methinks his flesh is punished, he shall have no desires. Page. So think I too. Mrs. Ford. Devise but how you'll use him when he comes, And let us two devise to bring him thither. Mrs. Page. There is an old tale goes, that Herne the hunter, Sometime a keeper here in Windsor forest, In a most hideous and dreadful manner. know, The superstitious idle-headed eld 28 This tale of Herne the hunter for a truth. Page. Why, yet there want not many that do fear In deep of night to walk by this Herne's oak. Mrs. Ford. Marry, this is our device; Page. Well, let it not be doubted but he'll come, And in this shape: when you have brought him thither, What shall be done with him? what is your plot? Mrs. Page. That likewise have we thought upon, and thus. Nan Page my daughter, and my little son, With rounds of waxen tapers on their heads, Mrs. Ford. And till he tell the truth, Evans. Let us about it: it is admirable pleasures and fery honest knaveries. [Exeunt PAGE, FORD, and EVANS. I'll to the doctor: he hath my good will, Ford. That will be excellent. I'll go buy them quick, snap. vizards. Mrs. Page. My Nan shall be the queen of all the fairies, Finely attired in a robe of white. Page. That silk will I go buy:-[aside] and in that time Shall Master Slender steal my Nan away, And marry her at Eton.-[To them.] Go send to Sim. Marry, sir, I come to speak with Sir John Falstaff from Master Slender. Host. There's his chamber, his house, his castle, his standing-bed, and truckle-bed; 32 'tis painted about with the story of the Prodigal, fresh and new. Go knock and call; he'll speak like an Anthropophaginian 33 unto thee: knock, I say. Sim. There's an old woman, a fat woman, gone up into his chamber: I'll be so bold as stay, sir, Ford. Nay, I'll to him again in name of till she come down; I come to speak with her, Brook: 26. To-pinch. Verbs were anciently formed with the prefix "to," as afterwards with 'be;' thus "to-pinch," to-tore,' were used for be-pinch, be-tore. 27. Sound For soundly,' in the sense of thoroughly, heartily; the adjective being used for the adverb. 28. Jack-an-apes. The derivation of this word has been variously given; but we imagine that it was originally a kind of jack-pudding, merry-andrew, or scaramouch character of the ancient drama, and came to signify a fantastic, coxcombical, or impertinent fellow. Here it seems to mean some fantastical elfin being that Sir Hugh intends to impersonate; and a delightfully characteristic effect is thus given, by Shakespeare's making the good-natured Welsh parson and schoolmaster not only teach the children their parts, but take part in the pastime himself. indeed. Host. Ha! a fat woman! the knight may be robbed: I'll call.-Bully knight! bully Sir John! speak from thy lungs military; art thou there? it is thine host, thine Ephesian," calls. Fal. [Above.] How now, nine host! 30. Properties. A technical theatric 1 term for stage necessaries; and "tricking" means the apparel in which the fairytroop are to be 'tricked out,' or dressed up. 31. Thick-skin. An old form of thick-skull, or thick head. It was 32. Standing-bed, and truckle-bed. The former was used for the master, the latter for the servant; and its name was derived from Latin, trochlea, a small wheel or castor. made to run under the larger bed; and hence the verb to 'truckle,' to be subservient. 33. Anthropophaginian. A cannibal, a man-eater; the Host enlarges even his usual style of grandiloquence to astound and overawe Simple. 34. Ephesian. A cant term of the period, possibly involving a hint that the person so called is of doubtful orthodoxy; for in "2 Henry IV.," i. 2, we find "What company?"— Ephesians, my lord; of the old church :" where the epithet is applied to thieves and roysterers. "Pagan" is also used in the same way. Probably the Host employs words he has heard applied o tavern-keepers and tavern-haunters, without much knowledge of or care for their original signification. Falstaff. Now, whence come you ? From the two parties, forsooth. Falstaff. The devil take one party, and his dam the other! Act IV. Scene V. Host. Here's a Bohemian-Tartar 35 tarries the coming down of thy fat woman. Let her descend, bully, let her descend. My chambers are honourable: fie privacy? fie! Enter FALSTAFF. Fal. There was, mine host, an old fat woman even now with me; but she's gone. Sim. Pray you, sir, was't not the wise woman of Brentford ? Fal. Ay, marry, was it, muscle-shell: 36 what would you with her? Sim. My master, sir, Master Slender, sent to her, seeing her go through the streets, to know, sir, 35. Bohemian-Tartar. "Tartars" and "Bohemians" were wandering hordes of gipsies, and the terms were applied to vagabonds generally; but the compound term is another of those sounding names that mine Host flings at Simple to bewilder him. 35. Muscle-shell. This epithet of Falstaff's sufficiently indi whether one Nym, sir, that beguiled him of a chain, Fal. I spake with the old woman about it. Fal. Marry, she says that the very same man that beguiled Master Slender of his chain, cozened him of it. Sim. I would I could have spoken with the woman herself; I had other things to have spoken with her too from him. Fal. What are they? let us know. Sim. I may not conceal them, sir. cates the scared appearance Simple presents, as he stands gaping and staring with his mouth open. 37. I may not conceal them. Simple's blunder for 'reveal, which the Host humours by his repeating the word in the same mistaken sense. Sim. Why, sir, they were nothing but about Mistress Anne Page; to know, if it were my master's fortune to have her or no. Fal. 'Tis, 'tis his fortune. Fal. To have her, or no. Go; say the woman told me so. Sim. May I be bold to say so, sir? Fal. Ay, Sir Tike," who more bold? Sim. I thank your worship: I shall make my master glad with these tidings. [Exit. Host. Thou art clerkly, thou art clerkly,39 Sir John. Was there a wise woman with thee? Fal. Ay, that there was, mine host; one that hath taught me more wit than ever I learned before in my life; and I paid nothing for it neither, but was paid for my learning." Enter BARDolph. Bard. Out, alas! sir; cozenage, mere cozenage! Host. Where be my horses? speak well of them, varletto. Bard. Run away with the cozeners: for so soon as I came beyond Eton, they threw me off, from behind one of them, in a slough of mire; and set spurs and away, like three German devils, three Doctor Faustuses.42 Host. They are gone but to meet the duke, villain: do not say they be fled; Germans are honest men. Enter SIR HUGH EVANS. Evans. Where is mine host? Host. What is the matter, sir? Evans. Have a care of your entertainments: there is a friend of mine come to town, tells me there is three cousin-germans" that has cozened all the hosts of Readings, of Maidenhead, of Colebrook, of horses and money. I tell you for goodwill, look you: you are wise, and full of gibes and vlouting-stogs, and 'tis not convenient you should be cozened. Fare you well. Enter DOCTOR CAIUS. [Exit. Caius. Vere is mine host de Jarretière? Host. Here, master doctor, in perplexity and doubtful dilemma. 38. Ay, Sir Tike. The Folio misprints 'like' for Tike," the word in the Quarto: signifying clown, lout, boor. 39 Clerkly. Scholarly, clever, learned. 43. Wise woman. An old name for a witch, or fortuneteller. 41 Paid nothing for it neither, but was paid, &c. "Paid" here is used first in its usual sense, and secondly, in its sense of being beaten, as we now say 'paid out.' 42 Doctor Faustuses. See Note 19, Act i. 43 Cousin-germans. Put into the mouth of the peppery Weshman by Shakespeare with confused significations: "cousin" Caius. I cannot tell vat is dat: but it is tell-a me, dat you make grand preparation for a duke de Jarmany: by my trot, dere is no duke dat de court is know to come. I tell you for good-vill: adieu. [Exit. Host. Hue and cry, villain, go!— Assist me, knight. I am undone !-Fly, run, hue and cry, villain!—I am undone! [Exeunt Host and BARD. Fal. I would all the world might be cozened; for I have been cozened and beaten too. If it should come to the ear of the court, how I have been transformed, and how my transformation hath been washed and cudgelled, they would melt me out of my fat, drop by drop, and liquor fishermen's boots with me: I warrant they would whip me with their fine wits till I were as crest-fallen as a dried pear. I never prospered since I forswore myself at primero." Well, if my wind were but long enough to say my prayers, I would repent. Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY. Now, whence come you? Quick. From the two parties, forsooth. Fal. The devil take one party, and his dam the other! and so they shall be both bestowed. I have suffered more for their sakes, more than the villainous inconstancy of man's disposition is able to bear. Quick. And have not they suffered? Yes, 1 warrant; speciously one of them; Mistress Ford, good heart, is beaten black and blue, that you cannot see a white spot about her. Fal. What tellest thou me of black and blue? I was beaten myself into all the colours of the rainbow; and I was like to be apprehended for the witch of Brentford: but that my admirable dexterity of wit, my counterfeiting the action of an old woman, delivered me, the knave constable had set me i' the stocks, i' the common stocks, for a witch. 45 meaning a kinsman, yet sounding like 'cozen,' to cheat; while germans" mean relations, as well as natives of Germany. 44. Primero. A game of cards much played in Shakespeare's time; its name being derived from the Spanish, and from a certain order of cards first shown and seen, winning the game. 45. Counterfeiting the action of an old woman. Falstaff plumes himself upon enacting the part of a guileless old woman, a harmless, simple old creature, with nothing of the "witch" about her. It would be superfluous to explain this, were it not that such good commentators as Theobald and Johnson have checked at the passage as it stands. SCENE VI-Another room in the Garter Inn. Enter FENTON and Host. Host. Master Fenton, talk not to me; my mind is heavy: I will give over all. Fent. Yet hear me speak. Assist me in my purpose, And, as I am a gentleman, I'll give thee Fent. From time to time I have acquainted you I'll show you here at large. [pointing to letter.] Hark, good mine host: To-night at Herne's oak, just 'twixt twelve and one, Must my sweet Nan present the Fairy Queen; The purpose why, is here [Pointing to letter]: in which disguise, While other jests are something rank on foot, 46 Now, sir, Fent. Both, my good host, to go along with me: Host. Well, husband your device; I'll to the vicar. Bring you the maid, you shall not lack a priest. Fent. So sha'l I evermore be bound to thee; Besides, I'll make a present recompense. [Exeunt. |