better account. I do fay, that Lady P* is a reafonable woman; and, I think,, fhe will not take it amifs, if I fhould infift upon efteeming her, inftead of Toafting her, like a filly thing I could name, who is the Venus of these days. I fee you had forgot my letter, or would not let her know how much I thought of her in this reafonable way: but I have been kinder to you, and have fhewn your letter to one who will take it candidly.

But, for God's fake, what have you faid about Politicians? you made me a great compliment in the truft you reposed in my prudence, or what mifchief might not I have done you with some that affect that denomination? Your Lordship might as fafely have spoken of Heroes. What a blufter would the God of the winds have made, had one that we know puff'd against olus, or (like Xerxes) whipp'd the feas? They had dialogued it in the language of the Rehearsal,

I'll give him flash for flash

I'll give him dafh for dafb

But all now is fafe; the Poets are preparing fongs of joy, and Halcyon days are the word.

I hope, my Lord, it will not be long before your dutiful affection brings you to town. I fear it will a little raise your envy to find all the Mufes employed in celebrating a Royal work *, which your own partiality will think inferior to Bevis-Mount. But if you have any inclination to be even with them, you need but put three or four Wits into any hole, in your Garden, and they will out-rhyme all Eaton and Westminster, I think, Swift, Gay, and I could undertake it, if you don't think our Heads too expenfive: but the fame hand that did

The Hermitage.

the

I

the others, will do them as cheap. If all elfe fhould fail, you are fure at least of the head, hand, and heart of your fervant.

Why fhould you fear any difagreeable news to reach us at Mount Bevis? Do as I do even within ten miles of London, let no news whatever come near you. As to public affairs we never knew a deader season: 'tis all filent, deep tranquillity. Indeed, they fay, 'tis fometimes so just before an Earthquake. But whatever happens, cannot we observe the wife neutrality of the Dutch, and let all about us fall by the ears? or if you, my Lord, fhould be prick'd on by any old-fashion'd notions of Honour and Romance, and think it neceffary for the General of the Marines to be in action, when our Fleets are in motion; meet them at Spithead, and take me along with you. I decline no danger where the glory of Great Britain is concern'd; and will contribute to empty the largest bowl of punch that shall be rigg'd out on fuch an occafion. Adieu, my Lord, and may as many Years attend you, as may be happy and honourable!

LETTER XXXVI.

From the Earl of PETERBOROW.

You

OU must receive my letters with a juft impartiality, and give grains of allowance for a gloomy or rainy day; I fink grievously with the weather-glafs, and am quite fpiritlefs when opprefs'd with the thoughts of a Birth-day or a Return.

Dutiful affection was bringing me to town, but undutiful laziness, and being much out of order, keep me in the country; however, if alive, I must

I

make

make my appearance at the Birth-day. Where you howed one letter, you may fhew the other; the that never was wanting in any good office in her power, will make a proper excufe, where a fin of Omiffion, I fear, is not reckoned as a venial fin.

I confent you shall call me polemic, or affociate me to any fect or Corporation, provided you do not join me to the Charitable Rogues or to the Pacific Politicians of the prefent age. I have read over Barkley in vain, and find, after a ftroke given on the left, I cannot offer the right cheek for another blow all I can bring myself to, is to bear mortification from the Fair fex with patience.

You seem to think it vexatious that I fhall allow you but one woman at a time, either to praise, or love. If I difpute with you upon this point, doubt every jury will give a verdict against me. So, Sir, with a Mahometan indulgence, I allow you pluralities, the favourite privilege of our church.

I find you do not mend upon correction; again I tell you, you must not think of women in a reafonable way: you know we always make Goddesses of those we adore upon earth; and do not all the good men tell us, we muft lay afide Reafon in what relates to the Deity?

'Tis well the Poets are preparing fongs of joy : 'tis well to lay in antidotes of foft rhyme, against the rough profe they may chance to meet with at Westminster. I fhould have been glad of any thing of Swift's: pray, when you write to him next, tell him I expect him with impatience, in a place as odd and as much out of the way, as himself.

Yours.

* Barkley's apology for the Quakers. P.

VOL. VIII.

M

LET

LETTER XXXVII:

From the fame.

Henever you apply as a good Papift to your female Mediatrix, you are fure of fuccefs; but there is not a full affurance of your entire fubmiffion to mother-church, and that abates a little of your authority. However, if you will accept of country letters, fhe will correfpond from the hay-cock, and I will write to you upon the fide of my wheelbarrow: furely fuch letters might escape examination.

Your Idea of the Golden Age is, that every fhepherd might pipe where he pleased. As I have lived longer, I am more moderate in my wishes, and would be content with the liberty of not piping where I am not pleased.

Oh how I wifh, to myself and my friends, a freedom which Fate feldom allows, and which we often refuse ourselves! why is our Shepherdefs in voluntary flavery? why muft our Dean fubmit to the Colour of his coat, and live absent from us?

and why are you confined to what you cannot

relieve?

I feldom venture to give accounts of my journeys before-hand, because I take resolutions of going to London, and keep them no better than quarrelling lovers do theirs. But the devil will drive me thither about the middle of next month, and I will call upon you, to be fprinkled with holy water, before I enter the place of corruption.

Your, &c.

* Mrs. H.

LET

LETTER XXXVIII.

From the fame.

1732.

I

AM under the greateft impatience to see Dr. Swift at Beyis-Mount, and must fignify my mind to him by another hand, it not being permitted me to hold correspondence with the faid Dean, for no letter of mine can come to his hands.

And whereas it is apparent, in this proteftant land, most especially under the care of divine providence, that nothing can fucceed or come to a happy iffue but by Bribery; therefore let me know what he expects to comply with my defires, and it fhall be remitted unto him.

For tho' I would not corrupt any man for the whole world, yet a benevolence may be given without any offence to confcience; every one must confefs, that gratification and corruption are two diftinct terms nay at worst many good men. hold, that for a good end, fome very naughty measures may be made use of.

But, Sir, I must give you fome good news inrelation to myfelf, becaufe, I know, you with me well; I am cur'd of fome difeafes in my o old age, which tormented me very much in my youth.

I was poffefs'd with violent and uneafy paffions, fuch as a peevish concern for Truth *, and a faucy love for my country.

When a Chriftian Prieft preached against the Spirit of the Gofpel, when an English Judge de-, termined against Magna Charta, when the Minifter acted against Common Senfe, I used to fret.

STA3may be feen from his tranfactions with Fenwick in the year 1696. S ovog

1579

M 2

Now,