ACT II PET. Ay; to the proof; as mountains are for winds,
Sc. I
That shake not, though they blow perpetually.

Re-enter HORTENSIO, with his head broke.

140

BAP. How now, my Friend! why dost thou look so pale?
Hor. For fear, I promise you, if I look pale.

BAP. What, will my daughter prove a good musician ?

Hor. I think she'll sooner prove a soldier :

Iron may hold with her, but never lutes.

BAP. Why, then thou canst not break her to the lute?

HOR. Why, no; for she hath broke the lute to me.

I did but tell her she mistook her frets,1

And bow'd her hand to teach her fingering,

When, with a most impatient devilish spirit,

150

Frets call you these? quoth she; I'll fume with them:

And with that word she struck me on the head,

And through the instrument my pate made way;
And there I stood amazed for a while

As on a pillory, looking through the lute;

While she did call me rascal Fiddler

And twangling Jack, with twenty such vile terms,
As she had studied to misuse me so.

PET. Now, by the World, it is a lusty wench;
I love her ten times more than e'er I did:

O, how I long to have some chat with her!
BAP. Well, go with me, and be not so discomfited:
Proceed in practice with my younger daughter;
She's apt to learn, and thankful for good turns.
Signior Petruchio, will you go with us,
Or shall I send my daughter Kate to you ?
PET. I pray you do; I will attend her here,

160

[Exeunt all but PETRUCHIO.

And woo her with some spirit when she comes.
Say that she rail; why, then I'll tell her plain
She sings as sweetly as a nightingale:
Say that she frown; I'll say she looks as clear
As morning roses newly wash'd with dew :
Say she be mute and will not speak a word;
Then I'll commend her volubility,

170

And say she uttereth piercing eloquence :
If she do bid me pack, I'll give her thanks
As though she bid me stay by her a week:
If she deny to wed, I'll crave the day
When I shall ask the banns, and when be married.
But here she comes; and now, Petruchio, speak.

180

Enter KATHARINA.

Good morrow, Kate; for that's your name, I hear. KATH. Well have you heard, but something hard of hearing:

They call me Katharine that do talk of me.
PET. You lie, in faith; for you are call'd plain Kate,
And bonny Kate, and sometimes Kate the curst;
But, Kate, the prettiest Kate in Christendom,
Kate of Kate-Hall, my super-dainty Kate,
For dainties are all Kates;1 and therefore, Kate,

Take this of me, Kate of my consolation :

Hearing thy mildness prais'd in every town,
Thy virtues spoke of, and thy beauty sounded,
Yet not so deeply as to thee belongs,

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Myself am mov'd to woo thee for my wife.

KATH. Mov'd! in good time:* let him that mov'd you hither

Remove you hence: I knew you at the first

You were a movable.

PET.

KATH. A joint-stool. PET.

Why, what's a movable ?

Thou hast hit it: come, sit on me.

KATH. Asses are made to bear, and so are you.
PET. Women are made to bear, and so are you.
KATH. No jade for such as you, if me you mean.
PET. Alas, good Kate, I will not burden thee!

For, knowing thee to be but young and light-
KATH. Too light for such a swain as you to catch;
And yet as heavy as my weight should be.

PET. Should be! should buzz!

KATH.

200

Well ta'en,' and like a buzzard.5

PET. O slow-wing'd turtle! shall a buzzard take thee?

ACT II
Sc. I

ACT II
Sc. I

1

КАТH. Ay; for a turtle; as she takes a buzzard.
PET. Come, come, you Wasp ; i'faith, you are too angry.
KATH. If I be waspish, best beware my sting.

PET. My remedy is, then, to pluck it out.

KATH. Ay; if the fool could find it where it lies.

210

PET. Who knows not where a wasp does wear his sting?
In his tail.

KATH. In his tongue.

PET. Whose tongue ?

KATH. Your's, if you talk of tails: and so farewell.

PET. What, with my tongue in your tail? nay, come

again,

Good Kate; I am a gentleman.

KATH.

That I'll try. [striking him.

PET. I swear I'll cuff you, if you strike again.
KATH. So may you lose your arms :

If you strike me, you are no gentleman ;
And if no gentleman, why, then no arms.
PET. A herald, Kate? O, put me in thy books !2
KATH. What is your crest ? a coxcomb ?*

PET. A combless cock, so Kate will be my hen.
KATH. No cock of mine; you crow too like a craven.

220

PET. Nay, come, Kate, come; you must not look so

sour.

KATH. It is my fashion when I see a crab.*

PET. Why, here's no crab; and therefore look not sour.

KATH. There is, there is.

230

PET. Then shew it me.

KATH.

Had I a glass, I would.

PET. What, you mean my face?

KATH. Well aim'd of such a young one.

PET. Now, by Saint George, I am too young for you.

KATH. Yet you are wither'd.

PET.

KATH.

'Tis with cares.

I care not.

PET. Nay; hear you, Kate: in sooth, you 'scape not so.

KATH. I chafe you, if I tarry: let me go.

PET. No, not a whit: I find you passing gentle.

'Twas told me you were rough, and coy, and sullen,
And now I find Report a very liar;

240

For thou art pleasant, gamesome, passing courteous ;
But slow in speech, yet sweet as spring-time flowers :
Thou canst not frown, thou canst not look askance,
Nor bite the lip, as angry wenches will;
Nor hast thou pleasure to be cross in talk;
But thou with mildness entertain'st thy wooers,
With gentle conference, soft and affable.
Why does the world report that Kate doth limp ?
O slanderous world! Kate, like the hazel-twig,
Is straight and slender; and as brown in hue
As hazel-nuts, and sweeter than the kernels.
O, let me see thee walk: thou dost not halt!
KATH. Go, Fool, and whom thou keep'st command.
PET. Did ever Dian so become a grove

As Kate this chamber with her princely gait ?
O, be thou Dian, and let her be Kate;

And then let Kate be chaste, and Dian sportful!
KATH. Where did you study all this goodly speech ?
PET. It is extempore, from my mother-wit.

KATH. A witty mother! witness else her son!

PET. Am I not wise?

KATH.

Yes; and so keep you warm.

PET. Marry, so I mean, sweet Katharine, in thy bed :
And therefore, setting all this chat aside,

Thus in plain terms: your father hath consented
That you shall be my wife; your dowry 'greed on ;
And, will you, nill you, I will marry you.
Now, Kate, I am a husband for your turn;
For by this light, whereby I see thy beauty,
Thy beauty, that doth make me like thee well,
Thou must be married to no man but me;
For I am he am born to tame you, Kate,
And bring you from a wild Kate to a Kate1
Conformable, as other household Kates.
Here comes your father: never make denial;
I must and will have Katharine to my wife.

Re-enter BAPTISTA, GREMIO, and TRANIO.
BAP. Now, Signior Petruchio, how speed you with
My daughter?

1 with a play on 'cat.'

250

260

270

ACT II
Sc. I

III: E

33

ACT II
Sc. I

PET.

How but well, Sir? how but well?

It were impossible I should speed amiss.
BAP. Why, how now, daughter Katharine! in your
dumps ?

KATH. Call you me daughter? now, I promise you,
You have shew'd a tender fatherly regard,
To wish me wed to one half lunatic;
A mad-cap ruffian and a swearing Jack,
That thinks with oaths to face the matter out.

PET. Father, 'tis thus: yourself and all the world,
That talk'd of her, have talk'd amiss of her :
If she be curst, it is for policy;

For she's not froward, but modest as the dove;

She is not hot, but temperate as the morn;
For patience she will prove a second Grissel,
And Roman Lucrece for her chastity :

And, to conclude, we have 'greed so well together

That upon Sunday is the wedding-day.

KATH. I'll see thee hang'd on Sunday first.
GRE.

280

290

Hark, hark.

300

Petruchio! she says she'll see thee hang'd first.
TRA. Is this your speeding? nay, then good night our pact!
PET. Be patient, Gentlemen; I choose her for myself:
If she and I be pleas'd, what's that to you?
'Tis bargain'd 'twixt us twain, being alone,
That she shall still be curst in company.
I tell you, 'tis incredible to believe
How much she loves me: O, the kindest Kate!
She hung about my neck; and kiss on kiss
She vied1 so fast, protesting oath on oath,
That in a twink she won me to her love.
O, you are novices! 'tis a world to see
How tame, when men and women are alone,
A meacock wretch can make the curstest shrew.
Give me thy hand, Kate: I will unto Venice
To buy apparel 'gainst the wedding-day.
Provide the feast, Father, and bid the guests;
I will be sure my Katharine shall be fine.
BAP. I know not what to say: but give me your hands;
God send you joy, Petruchio! 'tis a match.

310