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Crowns in my purse I have, and goods at home,
And so am come abroad to see the world.
HOR. Petruchio, shall I then come roundly to thee,
And wish thee to a shrewd ill-favour'd' wife?
Thou 'dst thank me but a little for my counsel :
And yet I 'll promise thee she shall be rich,
And very rich. But thou 'rt too much my friend,
And I 'll not wish thee to her.
Pet. Signior Hortensio, 'twixt such friends as we
Few words suffice; and therefore, if thou know
One rich enough to be Petruchio's wife,
As wealth is burden of my wooing dance,
Be she as foul as was Florentius' love,
As old as Sibyl, and as curst and shrewd
As Socrates' Xanthippe, or a worse;
She moves me not, or not removes at least
Affection's edge in me, were she as rough
As are the swelling Adriatic seas :
I come to wive it wealthily in Padua ;
If wealthily, then happily in Padua.
GRU. Nay; look you, Sir, he tells you flatly what his
mind is: why, give him gold enough, and marry him to
a puppet or an aglet-baby ;' or an old trots with ne'er a
tooth in her head, though she have as many diseases
as two-and-fifty horses : why, nothing comes amiss, so
money comes withal.
HOR. Petruchio, since we are stepp'd thus far in,
I will continue that I broach'd in jest.
I can, Petruchio, help thee to a wife
With wealth enough, and young and beauteous;
Brought up as best becomes a gentlewoman:
Her only fault, and that is faults enough,
Is that she is intolerable curst,
And shrewd, and froward; so beyond all measure
That, were my state far worser than it is,
I would not wed her for a mine of gold.
Pet. Hortensio, peace! thou know’st not gold's effect:
Tell me her father's name, and 'tis enough;
For I will board her, though she chide as loud
As thunder, when the clouds in Autumn crack.
HOR. Her father is Baptista Minola,
An affable and courteous gentleman :
Her name is Katharina Minola,
Renown'd in Padua for her scolding tongue.
Pet. I know her father, though I know not her;
And he knew my deceased father well.
I will not sleep, Hortensio, till I see her;
And therefore let me be thus bold with
you To give you over at this first encounter, Unless
you will accompany me thither. Gru. I pray you, Sir, let him go while the humour lasts.
O’ my word, an she knew him as well as I do, she would think scolding would do little good upon him :
: she may, perhaps, call him half a score knaves or so: why, that's nothing; an he begin once, he'll rail in his rope'-tricks. I'll tell you what, Sir, an she stand him but a little, he will throw a figure in her face, and so disfigure her with it that she shall have no more
eyes to see withal than a cat. You know him not, Sir. HOR. Tarry, Petruchio, I must go with thee,
For in Baptista's keep my treasure is :
He hath the jewel of my life in hold, ,
His youngest daughter, beautiful Bianca,
And her withholds from me, and other more,
Suitors to her and rivals in my love;
Supposing it a thing impossible,
For those defects I have before rehears'd,
That ever Katharina will be woo'd:
Therefore this order hath Baptista ta'en
That none shall have access unto Bianca
Till Katharine the curst have got a husband.
GRU. Katharine the curst!
A title for a maid, of all titles the worst.
HOR. Now shall my friend Petruchio do me grace;
And offer me, disguis'd in sober robes,
To old Baptista as a schoolmaster
Well seen in music, to instruct Bianca ;
That so I may by this device at least
Have leave and leisure to make love to her,
And unsuspected court her by herself.
Gru. Here's no knavery! See, to beguile the old folks,
how the young folks lay their heads together!
Enter GREMIO, and LUCENTIO disguised.
Master, Master, look about you: who goes there,
Hor. Peace, Grumio! 'tis the rival of
Petruchio, stand by awhile.
GRU. A proper stripling and an amorous !
GRE. O, very well; I have perus’d the note.
you; I'll have them very fairly bound:
All books of love, see that at any hand,
And see you read no other lectures to her:
You understand me: over and beside
Signior Baptista's liberality,
I'll mend it with a largess. Take your paper too,
And let me have them very well perfum'd;
For she is sweeter than perfume itself
To whom they go to. What will
What will you read to her? ?
Luc. Whate'er I read to her, I 'll plead for you
As for my patron, stand you so assur’d,
As firmly as yourself were still in place:
Yea; and perhaps with more successful words
Than you, unless you were a scholar, Sir.
GRE. O this learning! what a thing it is!
GRU, O this woodcock !: what an ass it is!
PET. Peace, sirrah!
Hor. Grumio, mum! God save you, Signior Gremio!
GRE. You are well met, Signior Hortensio.
Trow you whither I am going? To Baptista Minola.
I promis'd to inquire carefully
About a schoolmaster for fair Bianca:
And by good fortune I have lighted well
On this young man; for learning and behaviour
Fit for her turn; well read in poetry
And other books, good ones, I warrant ye.
HOR. 'Tis well: and I have met a gentleman
Hath promis’d me to help me to another,
A fine musician to instruct our mistress;
So shall I be no whit behind in duty
To fair Bianca, so belov'd of me.
GRE. Belov'd of me; and that my deeds shall prove.
GRU. And that his bags shall prove!
HOR. Gremio, 'tis now no time to vent our love:
Listen to me; and, if you speak me fair,
I'll tell you news indifferent good for either.
Here is a gentleman, whom by chance I met,
Upon agreement from us to his liking
Will undertake to woo curst Katharine;
Yea; and to marry her, if her dowry please.
GRE. So said, so done, is well.
Hortensio, have you told him all her faults ? Pet. I know she is an irksome brawling scold :
If that be all, Masters, I hear no harm. GRE. No ? sayest me so, Friend?
What countryman? Pet. Born in Verona, old Antonio's son:
My father dead, my fortune lives for me ;
And I do hope good days and long to see.
GRE. Sir, such a life, with such a wife, were strange!
But if you have a stomach, to't a' God's name!
You shall have me assisting you in all.
But will you woo this wild-cat ?
Will I live?
Gru. Will he woo her? ay; or I 'll hang her.
PET. Why came I hither but to that intent?
Think you a little din can daunt mine ears?
Have I not in my time heard lions roar ?
Have I not heard the Sea, puff*d up with winds,
Rage like an angry boar chafed with sweat ?
Have I not heard great ordnance in the field,
And Heaven's artillery thunder in the skies?
Have I not in a pitched battle heard
Loud 'larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets' clang?
And do you tell me of a woman's tongue;
That gives not half so great a blow to th’ear
As will a chestnut in a farmer's fire ?
Tush, tush I fearboys with bugs.
ACT I GRE. Hortensio, hark :
Sc. II This gentleman is happily arriv’d,
My mind presumes, for his own good and our's.
Hor. I promis'd we would be contributors,
And bear his charge of wooing, whatsoever.
GRE. And so we will, provided that he win her.
Gru. I would I were as sure of a good dinner!
Enter TRANIO, brave,' and BIONDELLO.
Tra. Gentlemen, God save you! If I may be bold, tell
me, I beseech you, which is the readiest way to the
house of Signior Baptista Minola ?
GRE. He that has the two fair daughters: is 't he you
TRA. Even he: Biondello !
GRE. Hark you, Sir; you mean not her tom
TRA. Perhaps, him and her, Sir: what have you to do?
Per. Not her that chides, Sir, at any hand, I pray.
Tra. I love no chiders, Sir. Biondello, let's
Luc. Well begun, Tranio.
Sir, a word ere you go:
Are you a suitor to the maid you talk of, yea or no?
Tra. An if I be, Sir, is it any offence ?
GRE. No; if without more words you will get you hence.
TRA. Why, Sir, I pray, are not the streets as free
For me as for you?
But so is not she.
TRA. For what reason, I beseech you ?
For this reason, if you 'll know,
That she's the choice love of Signior Gremio.
Hor. That she's the chosen of Signior Hortensio.
TRA. Softly, my Masters ! if you be gentlemen,
Do me this right; hear me with patience.
Baptista is a noble gentleman,
To whom my father is not all unknown;
And, were his daughter fairer than she is,
She may more suitors have, and me for one.
Fair Leda's daughter had a thousand wooers;
Then well one more may fair Bianca have: