1846] VALUABLE KNOWLEDGE OBTAINED. 27 usually suspect it. The discovery argued favourably for her future improvement. "I have lived too much in an ideal world, a world which my own fancy created. I have examined human nature through every telescope but that of truth. I now begin to fear that with all my eagerness after knowledge, I have omitted one of the most important acquisitions- a knowledge of myself. All I have lately attained has served only to convince me of my ignorance." As a manifestation of character the following extract is worthy of insertion. It shows that she possessed much of the material which makes true friendship. It is dated August 3rd, and relates to a young friend then resident in Leeds :-"I called upon Mr. T at his warehouse, and found that his sister was worse. Poor Helen! what would I give to be near her, to smooth the rough pillow of sickness, to watch by her lonely couch, and to minister to every want! I walked past the house that I might at least have the satisfaction of being within a few yards of her, and wept to think that I might not keep one lonely vigil by her side. None but her medical attendant and nurse are permitted to see her." A strong affinity subsisted between her mind and that of her departed brother. At times she realised this vividly. On the 28th she writes :- "I never was so much struck with the constitutional similarity of mind between my brother John and myself as to-day, when taking up his memoir, I opened on these words : 'I now see that I could soon write myself out of existence.' I have often thought that were I laid upon my death-bed this passion would outlive every other. Never did I feel such a oneness of spirit with him, as while reading his quotation from those exquisite lines of Mrs. Hemans' 'Mozart's Requiem,' which he applies to the too much indulged passion for writing :— Yet have I known it long, Too restless and too strong Within this clay hath been the o'ermastering flame; Swift thoughts that came and went, Like torrents o'er me sent, Have shaken, as a reed, this thrilling frame.' I sometimes think I have cherished this passion too extensively. It has been too strong for my physical and nervous system. Writing has a similar effect on my mind to that of music on a person endowed with a peculiarly refined taste for that science. It is a sort of pouring out of the soul. It delights and soothes, while, at the same time, it is pressing the beauty of life' from the heart." The intensity of her desire for improvement here reveals itself. Sept. 10th:-"I am reading Howe. His style is not winning, but there is an uncommon grandeur and dignity in his thoughts. I am convinced that theology will most benefit me just now. I want something to call forth my mind as well as to fortify my heart." A letter to her brother dated September 26th excites our sympathy, and reveals the efficacy of "a determined effort" in cases where it is usually deemed powerless :-" My present course of life exacts a fearful tribute from my mental, as well as bodily, energies. I want society. Solitude leads me to study, and its effects have been very injurious. Think of my rising from bed for a week together, when I have slept, on an average, but three hours per night, and you will not wonder that during the day I have been intolerably dull. I could have slept if I could have banished thought, but my energies were just awaking at bed 1846] FILIAL AFFECTION. 29 time. I am thankful, however, that after a most determined effort I have got the better of this. You know nothing of me. I am another being when you are here. Now I am in as absolute solitude as was Robinson Crusoe." The moral tendency of her aspirations, and her strong filial affection, are exhibited in an entry dated October 12th. Would that all such mothers were thus regarded! Do not a mother's toils, sufferings, and sacrifices, demand such recompense? If, mothers, it be sometimes denied you, the consciousness of deserving it is a satisfaction and a joy.—“This morning I was led to indulge in a strain of thought which, I trust, will have a salutary influence on my conduct. In the positions of daughter, sister, and aunt, I would be found doing my duty. The discharge of that duty may bring with it innumerable blessings. Its nonperformance may be attended with bitter consequences, followed by unavailing regret. There is one who demands all my sympathy and affection; who, as a wife and mother has discharged the important duties of her station in a manner which evinced the strength of her conjugal and maternal affection, and whose peculiarly trying circumstances gave an opportunity for the full development of that devoted, disinterested, Christian heroism, which her children will remember with gratitude, when her name and the memory of her high worth will be enshrined only in the hearts of those who witnessed it. Of such fortitude in trial steadfastness in adversity and dauntless energy, when despair would have overwhelmed some hearts— and, above all, of such unassuming piety, fame speaks not. But these are engraved in a more enduring page, and will have their reward when earth, and its blazoned pomp and pride, shall have passed away like a vision." Feb. 28th."I have been thinking that the more I see and feel of the passions of the human heart, and the more extensive my acquaintance with the natural world becomes, the more clearly do I perceive an analogy between them. I know of no feeling in that busy world the heart which has not an emblem in the physical world. This analogy is often very subtle and mysterious. The busy tribes know or heed it not. A thinking few discern and feel it. With what clearness must He behold it, to whose vision thoughts, feelings, intents, and passions, are as discernible as the material creations of His hand!" During this spring she composed the following verses: A PRAYER. "When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I."-Psalm lxi. 2. When gathering storms hang o'er my head, Oh, Father, by Thy Spirit led, Let me find shelter from their wrath. When grief my heart would overwhelm, On that once-stricken, living, Rock, Mr. Hessel's health having declined for some time past, it was deemed necessary that he should abandon farming, and spend his remaining days in retirement. The family left Catterton in Autumn therefore, and 1847] BOSTON SPA. 31 removed to Boston Spa. Regret was naturally experienced at quitting the old house, and the severance of many interesting associations. Early in spring, in anticipation of removal, Miss Hessel had written: "I was thinking to-day that I could leave the home of my childhood without one feeling of regret, but as I looked on each familiar thing, identified with my earliest infancy, they seemed to say: 'Oh! hath the memory Of other years no power upon thy soul, That thus, with tearless eyes, thou leavest us, And then I felt the spring-tide of early affection begin to flow, and the gushing tenderness of my heart testified to the memory of childhood's joys." In every respect, however, the change was beneficial. To her it was particularly welcome, for, besides the society it afforded-and a circle of attached friends was soon gathered, from whom many kindnesses were received,— the scenery presented many charms. The Wharfe, beautiful throughout its course, exhibits peculiar beauties in this locality. Enriched by numerous tributaries, its bed expands to a considerable breadth. Its banks, here precipitous, there gently sloping, are gracefully wooded. Proceeding from Thorp-Arch Station to Boston Spa, the traveller comes upon it suddenly. A bridge, rising to some considerable elevation, furnishes the first full view, and a delightful view it is. On the right, a cascade, caused by the weir of an adjacent mill, attracts attention. It is difficult to say whether this is most to be admired when the stream is swollen, and pours itself in massive grandeur with uproarious exultation, or when, by its shallowness, it exhibits a sheet of glistening silver. The mill |