made. However I would not discourage you; 'tis certain you have a ftrange happiness, in making fine things of a sudden and at a stroke, with incredible eafe and pleasure.

I am, &c.

LETTER II.

T is too much a rule in this town, that when a

IT

lady has once done a man a favour, he is to be rude to her ever after. It becomes our fex to take upon us twice as much as yours allow us; by this method I may write to you most impudently, becaufe you once answer'd me modeftly; and if you fhould never do me that honour for the future, I am to think (like a true coxcomb) that your filence gives confent. Perhaps you wonder why this is addrefs'd to you rather than to Mrs. M with whom I have the right of an old acquaintance, whereas you are a fine lady, have bright eyes, &c. First, Madam, I make choice of you rather than of your mother, because you are younger than your mother. Secondly, because I fancy you spell better, as having been at school later. Thirdly, because you have nothing to do but to write if you please, and poffibly it may keep you from employing yourself worse: it may save some honest neighbouring gentleman from three or four of your peftilent glances. Caft your eyes upon paper Madam, there you may look innocent.

ly men are feducing, books are dangerous, the amorous one's foften you, and the godly ones give

you the spleen: If you look upon trees, they clasp in embraces; birds and beasts make love; the fun is too warm for your blood; the moon melts you into yielding and melancholy. Therefore I fay once more, cast your eyes upon paper, and read only fuch letters as I write, which convey no darts, no flames, but proceed from innocence of foul, and fimplicity of heart. Thank God I am an hundred miles off from thofe eyes! I would fooner trust your hand than them for doing me mischief; and tho' I doubt not fome part of the rancour and iniquity of your heart will drop into your pen, yet fince it will not attack me on a fudden and unprepared, fince I may have time while I break open your letter to cross myself and say a Pater-nofter, I hope Providence will protect me from all you can attempt at this diftance. I am told you are at this hour as handfome as an angel; for my part I have forgot your face fince two winters. You may be grown to a giantess for all I know. I can't tell in any refpect what fort of creature you are, only that you are a very mischievous one, whom I shall ever pray to be defended from. But when your Minifter fends me word you have the small pox, a good many freckles, or are very pale, I will defire him to give thanks for it in your parish church; which as foon as he fhall inform me he has done, I will make you a vifit without armour: I will eat any thing you give me

without fufpicion of poifon, take you by the hand without gloves, nay venture to follow you into an arbour without calling the company. This, Madam, is the top of my wishes, but how differently are our defires inclined! You figh out, in the ardour of your heart, Oh play-houses, parks, opera's, affemblies, London! I cry with rapture, Oh woods, gardens, rookeries, fifh-ponds, arbours! Mrs. M.

LETTER III.

To a LADY.

Written on one column of a Letter, while Lady M. wrote to the Lady's Hufband on the other.

HE wits would say, that this must needs be a

TH

dull letter because it is a married one. I am afraid indeed you will find, what spirit there is, muft be on the fide of the wife, and the husband's part, as ufual, will prove the dulleft. What an unequal pair are put together in this sheet? in which, though we fin, it is you must do penance. When you look on both fides of this paper, you may fancy that our words (according to a Scripture expression) are as a two-edg'd fword, whereof lady M. is the fhining blade, and I only the handle. But I can't proceed without fo far mortifying Sir Robert as to tell him, that the writes this purely in obedience to me, and that it is but one of those honours a husband receives for the fake of his wife.

It is making court but ill to one fine woman to fhew her the regard we have for another; and yet I must own there is not a period of this epiftle but squints towards another over-againft it. It will be in vain to diffemble: your penetrating eyes cannot but difcover, how all the letters that compose these words lean forward after lady M's letters, that feem to bend as much from mine, and fly from them as fast as they are able. Ungrateful letters that they are! which give themselves to another man, in the very prefence of him who will yield to no mortal in knowing how to value them.

You will think I forget myself, and am not writing to you; but, let me tell you, 'tis you forget yourfelf in that thought, for you are almost the only woman to whom one can safely addrefs the praifes of another. Besides, can you imagine a man of my importance fo ftupid, as to say fine things to you before your husband? Let us fee how far Lady M. herself dares do any thing like it, with all the wit and addrefs fhe is miftrefs of. If Sir Robert can be fo ignorant (now he is left to himself in the country) to imagine any fuch matter, let him know from me, that here in town every thing that lady fays, is taken for fatire. For my part, every body knows it is my conftant practice to fpeak truth, and I never do it more than when I call myfelf

Your, &c.

You

LETTER IV.

OU have put me into fo much gayety of temper, that there will not be a serious word in this day's letter. No more, you'll say, there would, if

I told you the whole serious business of the town. All laft night I continued with you, tho' your unreasonable regularity drove me out of your doors at three o'clock. I dreamed all over the evening's conversation, and faw the little bed in spite of you. In the morning I waked, very angry at your phantom for leaving me fo abruptly.-I know you delight in my mortification. I dined with an old Beauty; she appear'd at the table like a Death's head enamell'd. The Egyptians, you know, had fuch things at their entertainments; but do you think they painted and patched them? However, the laft of thefe objections was foon remov'd; for the lady had fo violent an appetite for a falmon, that fhe quickly eat all the patches off her face. She divided the fish into three parts; not equal, God knows; for fhe helped Gay to the head, me to the middle, and making the reft much the largest part took it herself, and cried very naively, I'll be content with my own tail.

A

My fupper was as fingular as my dinner. It was with a great Poet and Ode-maker (that is, a great poet out of his wits, or out of his way.) He came to me very hungry; not for want of a dinner (for that I fhould make no jeft of) but, having forgot to