Georgics, or Æneid, or hear the halls of an Alma Mater echoing as the student of Homer makes any lucky application from its pages to some dullard or eccentric companion. Around the social board, the little destinies of an evening are often determined by similar consultation of the same, or of some other books, which the party have constituted oracular, while ingenuity labors to fulfil the prophetic lines; playing children are found opening the lots, for happy indications, and the lover and the loved, in cloistered communings, seek for words of promise. It is a pretty practice enough, and we have no objection that it should carry with it a little harmless superstition.

I.

CATTLE SHOWS AND CONVENTIONS,

AND OTHER MATTERS.

No man can tell the exact influence that Cattle Shows have had on agriculture, and, especially, in improving the breed of domestic animals; but the influence has been great. It is not without regret that the public find that the Fair at Brighton seems to be in the wane, or shorn of its beams. There are less displays, than formerly, of both men and cattle. In Worcester, that great agricultural county, which is almost a state in itself, having all necessary resources, the attendance at the exhibition is equal to its importance, and seldom has the "Heart of the Commonwealth" been more rejoiced than in the present season. Such a show of animal and intellectual power can seldom be seen in far greater communities. But for the hospitality of the citizens, visiters would have had to lodge with the birds; for the town was inundated with strangers. There was no necessity of billeting these out; for the doors were open, and strangers invited to walk in. It seemed to be, for a season, like the renowned hospitality of Kentucky, where the householder permits no man to pass without refreshment, and where the traveler, who refuses to enter and partake, subjects himself to the suspicion of being a horse-thief or fugitive. To say that the taverns were crowded gives no idea of the manner in which the guests were packed. Early on the occasion every plank was appropriated, and happy the man who had the softest. It is said that a traveler, from a distant part, went into a public house, and, weary and dusty, sought to retire to his rest. "But we cannot accommodate you," said the host. "O, I am not difficult," said the wayfarer," and, as you are crowded, I will give you, for lodging, the amount of all the rest of the bill." "But our beds are all engaged-every one carries double." "I will sleep on that sofa, and give you two dollars." "But the Judge has engaged it, and the sheriff sleeps under it." "Confound it," said the traveler, "what shall I give you to let me hang up, for the night, by the side of that great coat?"

Conventions and Cattle Shows would do a good thing if they effected nothing more than the report of Committees, on the various subjects. referred to their consideration. Some of these reports have been written in a spirit of wit and humor, which might excite the envy of an ambitious essayist. We have just laid our eye upon one of these reports, which we transfer to the Magazine, as a gem that will not

lose its lustre by a few years of age. It is the report of the Committee on Swine, made at the Concord Cattle Show, by a Committee, of which Josiah Adams, Esq. of Framingham was Chairman. Having assigned the premiums, that worthy body directed its attention to the best economy in rendering the animal under consideration fit for an exhibition or a market. The too common way of dealing out to it, a meagre supply of food, like that furnished by the contractors of a poor-house, is reprobated. "True economy," says this document, "consists in replenishing the trough, at regular and short intervals. With such management, the hogs will eat less, and fat faster. A hog, to fat well, should have nothing to prey upon his mind. It is with him, as with us-the mere apprehension of poverty often makes us poor. Feed him well, so that he may not be obliged to squeal for a living. He is, in truth, a professional character. His office is to grow fat. Let him not be disturbed with other cares. So shall his leisure hours, which would otherwise be wasted in idle squealing, be devoted to those sound and refreshing slumbers, whose end is fatness.

"Your Committee have been deeply impressed with the consideration, that the spot, which they now tread, is no other than the scene, where a celebrated individual of this interesting class of animals, came to a most melancholy and untimely end; and they ask leave to relate, generally, the facts connected with that tragical event. It was on a fine morning, towards the close of the last century, that the sun arose in smiling splendor and cast his cheering beams on the time-worn dwelling of the unsuspecting victim. His two-legged tyrant was yet enjoying his morning slumbers, when his black man Cato, proceeded to execute the orders of the preceding evening, by removing the tenant to what they pleased to style "the new hog house." Without much explanation, a rope was made fast to the nose of the defendant, who, not understanding exactly what Cato would be at, and doubting, moreover, his authority in the premises, made his appeal to the right of the strongest; insomuch that the knight of the rope was obliged to take respite, by making the other end fast to a tree. It happened that a wood merchant, from another town, had already arrived with his load, and had left his team, in search of a purchaser. The thought struck Cato, that there would be no harm in just trying the strength of his horse; and so loosing him from the oxen, he made him fast to the rope.

"Your Committee had well nigh forgot to mention, that the hero of the tragedy had, all along, raised his voice, in decided accents, against these proceedings-fearing, no doubt, that some lawyer might trap him on the ground of assent; and when he perceived that Cato intended to take advantage of horse-power, his indignation was roused to a most becoming height, and he resisted with an obstinacy little less than human. Your Committee request to say, that it was all in vain! The horse, not understanding the precise nature of his loading, and not much fancying the looks of the driver, set off for home at full speed, with the hog at his heels. Cato stood aghast! and taking the subject into sudden consideration, cleared out, leaving appearances to explain themselves. Meanwhile the master had been awakened by the remonstrances of his hog, and the owner of the horse returned just in season to take a farewell glimpse. Each viewed the other as the undoubted author of the mischief, and a battle of words ensued, which every one

will conceive, according to the powers of his imagination. They were only restrained from blows, by the necessity of looking after their departed favorites. Suffice it to add, that the horse was found safe at home, with no other injury, than being a little overstrained in his wondering department; insomuch, that, to his last day, he could never form any satisfactory opinion of the kind of business they carry on at Concord. But alas! for the squeal! The hog continued to resist manfully to the last; being left by the way side, a mangled and breathless corse; a victim to the spirit of freedom; and a glorious example of resistance to arbitrary power! And here was spilt the first blood that was shed in that memorable war!"

From this event the Committee deduce certain practical lessons for which we have no space, being desirous of offering a letter, included in this same report, "written by a sensible individual of a drove."

To the Hog Committee of the Agricultural Society of the County of Middlesex; GENTLEMEN-While my fellow-travelers are taking their repose, and our drover his dram, I seize the occasion to address you in behalf of my species, with a hope that you will abate something of your prejudices against us, and be made more sensible of our merits and our wrongs; and I am not without some hope of exciting a fellow-feeling in the members of your Society, and most especially in yourselves. We flatter ourselves, moreover, that in the report, which you will soon be called upon to make, you will be induced to exercise, toward us, that charity which you profess so loudly for each other; and that you will do to us, as you would wish us to do, if called on to report our opinion of you. We all have our failings, you know; and if we find ours in the Concord Gazette, you may look for yours in the Charlestown Aurora.

We think we have some reason to complain of the conduct of your ancestors toward ours. The practice of yoking and ringing, introduced so long ago as the reign of William and Mary, and continued in force in your statute book to the present time, savors to us strongly of what you call a hoggish age. We complain especially, that, while your constitutional writ of habeas corpus secures, to you, your personal liberty, ours is made to depend on the contradictory decisions of what you are pleased to call your primary assemblies, in which we are generally represented by a small minority. By your statute of 1788, Chapter 56, it is enacted, among other strange things, that " any town may give liberty for swine to go at large, from the 15th day of April, to the 1st day of November, provided they be sufficiently yoked, and constantly ringed in the nose." And that it may be known what a sufficient yoking doth mean," Be it further enacted, that a yoke, which is the full depth of the Swine's neck, above the neck, and half so much below the neck; and the soal, or bottom of the yoke, full three times as long as the breadth or thickness of the Swine's neck, on which it is placed, shall be deemed and taken to be a sufficient yoking, within the true intent and meaning of this act.' It is true, that these legal enactments have, in some degree, become inoperative; but, whether this refinement in the manners of the age is to be attributed principally to your species, or ours, it would not be modesty in us to say.

We know it would be vain to reason against your practice of ending our existence in the morning of life; inasmuch as your interest is your motive. We are aware that you consider us as created for your use, and we submit in silence; saving always, to us and our successors, our ancient right of squealing ad libitum, whenever you lay a finger upon us. We only ask that, during our short sojournment among you, you will treat us with greater respect, and endeavor to make our situation more comfortable. We do not like, for instance, to hear you speak of the "Swinish Multitude." We consider it an invidious comparison. We have also been greatly astonished in our minds, and shocked in our feelings, when we have overheard you accuse each other of "getting as drunk as a beast.' For we are not so ignorant of men and things, as not to know that man is the only animal that gets drunk at all. And we think especially that you should cease such language, when you call to mind, how kindly we tucked up one of your frail brethren, when he lately sought repose in our bed of straw.

We would not boast of our merits; but we hope to be excused for mentioning some of the benefits which we confer on your race. And, first of all, have we

not given name and character to a society in your first literary institution? Who does not know that the "Pig Club," in Harvard University, has grown immensely wise and fat, by the immolation of our infant offspring? And again, does not your favorite dish of the bean-pot owe the richness of its flavor, to the once despised tenant of the hog-pen? And do we not often gratify your pride, aye and fill your empty purses, too, by appearing at your Cattle Shows? And are we not tolerably good company, on your way thither and back? What supports and sustains your militia officers, in their loftiest elevation, and in their proudest moments? Does not even your Major-General rest entirely on our skins, when performing his most glorious achievements, at a muster?

Then again you complain of our want of neatness! and who, pray, furnishes you with the means of being otherwise? If we were disposed to paint our habitations, inside and out, as you do; or even to white-wash them, as you do your out-houses; can you, of your own substance, furnish us with brushes, or anything else, for the purpose? If we were supplied, as you are, who can say whether your parlor floor, or ours, would exceed in neatness? Without any aid from your flesh-brush, do we not contrive to keep our pores as open, and our skins as cholera-proof as your own? With all the aids you might have from the clothes-brush, are you quite sure that your outer man, will, in all cases, compare with ours? Though we furnish you with the means of preserving your teeth, are they, after all, so well preserved as our own? Does the dandy at his glass remember, that he is indebted to our race, for the ease, with which he brushes his hair into those bewitching forms, so satisfactory to himself, and so taking with his fair one? You think you are indebted to the boot-black for making your boots shine like his own skin; but you forget that, without the material, which we furnish, there would be little difference, between the boot, which treads the hogyard, and that which trips the parlor carpet.

But I must close. I have neither patience nor time, to mention the aid we furnish your shoe-makers, and your extensive manufactories, or the thousand other ways in which we render you service. I must only add, that we esteem it most unkind and unfeeling in your race, that you should shave our murdered and helpless remains, without lather, while in the very act of taking from our backs, the article, which helps to smooth the passage of the razor, over your hardened and ungrateful faces.

But I will hope for better times; of which I seem to discover some faint dawnings. And I will not conceal my satisfaction, in seeing such men appointed on the Hog Committee, and in being credibly informed that you are not insensible of the honor.

MONTHLY RECORD.

NOVEMBER, 1832.

POLITICS AND STATISTICS.